What? you’re disgusted by the topic of this post? Shame on you. Menstruation is real- this means all the pains, embarrassments and raging hormones that come along with it.
However, if you know I’ve got a crush on you or you’ve got a crush on me (and happen to be good looking and know I might crush back on you)and this menstruation post might Continue reading
I woke up early this morning knowing I have a packed day and as such didn’t make any provision for folks messing with my time.
I got to my 9 a.m appointment and the guy wasn’t there. Mind you, I was there to photograph this group of guys as a favor. One would imagine they would bend backwards to accommodate me, but no, I had to be doing the bending. It’s 2015, I’m done with that, but I still managed to tap into my good side and scheduled another time with them.
Moved to my next appointment, which was scheduled to start at 9 a.m. I got there at about 9:30 and they were no where close to beginning.
To calm my nerves, I took a selfie and posted it on Instagram. (Yes, I’m sometimes vain like that. It has nothing to do with the fact that I feel beautiful today or anything to do with the purple wrap dress I have on. Thanks) Posted the photo and carried on with myassignment.
Got back to the office and saw instagram notifications. A number of likes and one comment. This comment was from a friend of mine in Nigeria informing me that he had unfollowed me.
My life instantly fell apart! How could he unfollow me, doesn’t he know my life revolves round instagram and the number of followers I have? How am I supposed to sleep at night knowing I have one less follower? How can he be this cruel?
I need to formally apologise to this guy for not following him back in the first place. I need to apologise for not finding his life and Instagram content interesting enough.
Life will never be the same until he follows me back!
I’m putting all my articles on hold until I rectify this issue.
Is this post sarcastic enough?
So lately, I’ve been thinking of the idea of going vegan. I like the idea of doing without meat/fish.
I notice each time I eat mainly fruits and vegetables with little to no carbs, I’m full of energy and so active.
Let’s just wait and see how the next few weeks go. Gradually making my way into the vegan life.
I just got robbed and I can’t even report the robbery to the police!
Hallelujah I’m not in Nigeria surrounded by the “You’re-next -aunties,” and I’m not attending any weddings where I’ll be constantly reminded of the need to get married. I’m only a few years below 30, but best believe this means nothing to those who think once you’re over 24 you should be in a marital home.
Anyway, that aside, I’ve just been thinking how boring and old I’m getting. I went to a magic show this evening and at the end of it all, I realized I barely laughed and I was very skeptical of the tricks that I couldn’t enjoy them. I’m sure younger me would have found those tricks really cool! But at this age, I’m too old to believe half of that bullocks!
I came back home, showered and sat down to watch YouTube videos with a glass of Moscato.
Boys and girls, I’m sure my fellow unmarried mates are out there having a good time, possibly socializing with friends or even dancing. But no, I’m here watching The Ellen show and thinking of what recipe to try next! Also, watching the show and removing “excess water” in my eyes looking at those feel-good features and gift givings on The Ellen Show.
(Dear Nigerian Husband, biko take your time, there are still a number of meals I haven’t learnt to cook yet. I don’t intend on having you eating out all the time)
Since Christmas, I notice I’ve been so domesticated. I’ve been cleaning more than usual, cooking and baking more and generally being a Martha Stewart.
I think the only thing left is for me to get some cats and rekindle my love for knitting, then start hosting tea parties!
Boys and girls, here’s a toast to being old at a really young age.
Sorry guys, it’s almost midnight, I should be asleep. I have to go to the gym in the morning!