Not Jealous, I Promise.

Dear Nigerian Husband,

You should know this by now, i really do enjoy working out. Apart from exercise helping to sculpt the body that will carry your offspring, it also keeps me sane and prevents me from going to jail (Just kidding, You don’t have to worry about that at all- I’m from a good home and know how to handle my anger.)

DSC_1604So for the past two years, I’ve exercised somewhat consistently and if not for bad eating habits every now and then, I’ll be on several runways around the world making money that will help in building that big family house we are going to have.
Lately though, I’ve taken the exercise and eating a bit more seriously. I’ve eaten more fruits and vegetables, I’ve increased my reps and the duration of time I spend in the gym.

But we have a problem. There are many things I dislike and bullying is one of them. I hope you can help me address this issue I’m about to tell you.

See, for the past week or so, I noticed two girls joined the gym. These girls don’t have any respect for us who have been coming to the gym for generations. Not only do they not have respect, those girls, in my opinion, have no reason to be at the gym; they have almost ‘perfect’ bodies. To make things really bad, a few days ago, I walked into the gym and noticed two of them working out in sports bras!

My dear Nigerian Husband, I almost fainted! What bullies! What do they want the rest of us one-pack bellies to do? How are we supposed to compete for the other guys’ attention? (Whether you like it or not, a lot of us women enjoy going to the gym for the little healthy stares we get from the guys- we enjoy it only if they flirt and stare respectfully)

My dear Nigerian Husband, you can’t just stay there and let those girls do as they please at the gym i’ve visited for a while. You shouldn’t let them body-bully your future Nigerian wife in such a manner. This is unacceptable. Haba! a whole sports bra? Showcasing perfect abs and well sculpted butts? This life isn’t’ fair!

While I wait onyou to address this behavior, I’m taking things into my own hands.ย DSC_1771

As of that day, I began doing more. I’ve been eating more fruits, vegetables and little carbs. I’m giving myself three weeks to catch up with those bullies. They want to be bullies? Let them wait and see how my abs will be. I won’t even need to wear sports bra openly- I’llleave that only for your eyes. I shall work out so hard that as soon as I walk into the gym, they’ll all walk out!

Idiots.

I’m not mad ย or anything, but I have to go. I’ve not done any exercise for the day.

Yours in marriage eventually,
Vou

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19 thoughts on “Not Jealous, I Promise.

  1. Lol, I totally understand. I had the same experience, this lady came to the gym and she was so skinny and I kept wondering what she was doing in the gym (Like there isn’t any fat to burn).

  2. Nice post! We have heard and ready for u… I was expecting some of the hot pix of yours to show us the dividends of your physical discipline and if possible go to the extreme to show us a flash of the curves (hehehe)….. You just leave us in the despair of a hot blooded juvenile imagination….. As for the bullies… I think they have contributed to your aggressive work out. if I were to be the Nigerian Husband… I will smile at them while I tell you “keep it up”… hehehe…. ‘no shoot me o’

    • Makama, thanks for always reading!
      Don’t mind that Nigerian Husband, I really hope he’s not out there laughing at my misfortune! That’ll break my heart!
      In the meantime, I’m still considering having photos of the worked-out body soon. Lol

  3. Hahaha! It’s not just about burning fats… It’s about staying physically fit and ready for any physical contest! I aint got no fats to burn, but I think I need to get into the gym to build up for my wife-to-be!

  4. Strange that you ladies don’t know that the skinny ladies need to be in the gym more than the chubby ones…. even though you already know the reasons why..

    The stares, the cool dudes, maintaining their hot bodies and oppressing the chubby ladies into being just like them, so they can do the same thing too…Vicious cycle eh?
    LOL

  5. I love this! At least you work out. I on the other hand, am struggling to understand the concept of eating vegetables. I hate to sweat (Excuse number 1) and I find routine exercise boring (Excuse number 2). I’m really trying to join the fitness life but its proving to be a challenge for me. Any tips for a sugar addict like me ๐Ÿ˜ฆ ??

    • Thanks Eniola!
      Sweating isn’t too bad, you know. Just give it a chance and a try ๐Ÿ™‚ you’ll learn to like it.
      I really wish I could give you advice, as as I write this reply, I’m gulping down a glass of wine and slices of bread! (Don’t judge me…) but on a serious note, I can take care of the wine and bread at the gym tmrw. The trick to dealing with serious sugar craving is to just get up and do something. Doesn’t have to e hard core workout. A simple walk should suffice. Good luck.

  6. ”body bullying” indeed….lol.
    As if that is not enough, you still see these “skinny” girls in body shapers and waist trainers.

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