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My Village People Almost Got Me.

Dear Nigerian Husband,

I’ve got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?

Let’s start with the bad news.

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See, my Nigerian Husband is a lucky man! See this beauty he gets to call his wife! To God be the glory.

So remember sometime at the beginning of 2019 when I attempted to make Masa. What a disaster that was. I almost put my good

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How We Met (I Got Tired of Church.)

Dear Unborn Children,

A few days ago on the 1095th day of your father and I knowing each other, I began telling you the story of how it all started. I had to make it short as I didn’t want to bore you with all those tiny details. Apparently, your curiosity has gotten the best of you as well as other aunties and uncles who have read my letters to you behind your back. (Adults these days, I tell ya!)
I digress.
See, when your father and I met, I didn’t think we would go beyond being friends. On the surface, he fit the perfect picture of a player. I wasn’t about to get my heart played and dumped like used diaper. I had to thread carefully.

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This card was among surprise gifts he gave me on our first Valentine’s Day together. Inside, he referred to me as his Future Mrs. Man, dude was seeing way into the future already.

Even as I moved with caution, your father was so intriguing: our conversations were really good. We could go for hours just chatting about nothing and anything. Hardly an hour went by without some kind of communication. (I’m sure he’ll remember when

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How We Met – 1095 Days Ago (Three Years.)

Dear Unborn Children,

I’ve told the story of how we met several times. It’s my favorite love story, I hope it becomes yours too.

However, a few days ago, a friend who had heard the story a few times asked me to tell the story to her sister. And for the first time, I didn’t have the same enthusiasm and in fact, I had left out a few important aspects and the friend had to chip in to remind me.

So for posterity and for family history, I’m telling this story on the third anniversary of your father and I’s first encounter.

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This was our very first photo together. We sat in a Kekenapep (Tricycle, Marwa) Outside my house. In less than an hour of meeting each other, he raised his butt cheek slightly from the chair and blessed me with his first fart.

As far as love is concerned, give it your all, love completely and be open-minded for when love shows up.
Let me explain.

After dating a few guys, even though nice guys, we didn’t quite work out, obviously. So I decided I Continue reading

I Wrote About My Husband Before We Met.

I’ve not written for a while and needless to say, I’ve felt off balanced to a degree. So I want to change that with what I hope would become series of letters to my unborn children. And I hope to tie these series to the series I wrote about their dad.

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See, if you’ve been a follower, or occasional visitor to my writing ramblings, you should be familiar with Continue reading

My In-laws May Not Be Happy.

Dear Nigerian Husband,

It’s been many weeks since I last wrote you. A lot has gone on, but they may be inconsequential for now.

I’ll shoot straight.
I’m afraid your North Eastern Nigerian family members may be looking to come kick me out of my matrimonial home if

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Award-winning Ogbono Soup.

This soup won awards, I’m in my house, come and beat me.

Dear Nigerian Husband,

I’m beginning to feel sorry for you.

See while you’re still stacking and working hard to come pay bride price, it appears the stakes may be getting higher; you may need to work a tad bit harder. I’m this close to being worried that by the time you bring your people to meet my people, you may not be able to afford my bride price.
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The Contender.

Girls and gentlemen and ladies,

So, after my two or so letters to the Nigerian Husband, I’ve had folks ask me if I’m not sure my letters are scaring the Nigerian Husband and most people just plain out want to know who the Nigerian Husband is….hahahha.. Keep asking…

There’s no Nigerian Husband really, but there is a Contender for the title (and he faces no competition)… I’ve always been under the impression that he doesn’t pay this blog any attention. ( I still think so. He only makes random appearance, or visits mostly when I send him a link and tell him he’s going to be drilled on what he reads.)

So yesterday, I felt like being a nag for no clear reason.. (You believe that??? Of course there was a reason… very insignificant issue- he always says.. I digress)
In an effort to shut me up, he asked “So when next are you going to write about the Nigerian Husband?” (The good man knows how to get me to calm down.

Can you believe The Contender and his guts? Haha… How dare he ask when I’m going to be writing my dear Nigerian Husband? Our correspondence is purely between the both of us and the frequency of such messages don’t depend or bow to outside pressure!

So, you Contender, keep reading and you’re sure not to miss any letters…

Amebo!